Heather Mills

[eamo]

A miner in Africa has an accident and loses a leg.

He says to his mate "I'm f*cked mate, who will want a one legged gold digger?"

His mate replies, "try Paul McCartney"

Another one

WHAT HAVE ARSENAL AND HEATHER MILLS McCARTNEY GOT IN COMMON ?

THEY COULD BOTH DO WITH A SECOND LEG !!!

[steamboatsam]

News reports have confirmed that Paul McCartney has separated from his
wife Heather Mills- McCartney.

Mrs Mills- McCartney is said to be distraught over the split "He has
been my crutch for so long!!" She said in an earlier briefing, "I have no
idea why this has happened, I'm stumped"

She's reported to be making frantic efforts to keep the split as civil
as possible.

"She's running around in circles", according to a close friend, "she
will need all the support she can get its not like its easy to walk out on a
relationship like this"

It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to the
marriage, Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the world amassing
a colossal wealth due to his participation with The Beatles and subsequent
musical collaborations, if an agreement hasn't been signed it is believed
that she won't have a leg to stand on.

Rumours abound over the split have suggested that infidelity may have
been the cause. "She's terrible" a source stated, "always trying to get her
leg over".

Another source has suggested that her battle with alcoholism was the
cause. "Macca couldn't handle it anymore" a friend said "he would get home at
night and find her legless"

Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the present
that Paul had got prior to the wedding; he gave her a new prosthetic leg for
Christmas but that was just a stocking-filler. The main gift was a plane
but then he gave her a Ladyshave for the other leg.